Enter Caliban with a burden of wood. A noise of thunder heard.
CALIBAN
All the infections that the sun sucks upFrom bogs, fens, flats, on Prosper fall, and make himBy inch-meal a disease! His spirits hear me,And yet I needs must curse. But they’ll nor pinch,Fright me with urchin-showsAn apparition or spectacle produced by fairies or goblins., pitch me i’ the mire,Nor lead me, like a firebrand, in the darkOut of my way, unless he bid ’em; butFor every trifle are they set upon me,Sometime like apes that mowA grimace or contorted facial expression. and chatter at me,And after bite me; then like hedgehogs whichLie tumbling in my barefoot way, and mountTheir pricks at my footfall; sometime am IAll wound with adders, who with cloven tonguesDo hiss me into madness.
Enter Trinculo.
CALIBAN
Lo, now, lo!Here comes a spirit of his, and to torment meFor bringing wood in slowly. I’ll fall flat;Perchance he will not mind me.
TRINCULO
Here’s neither bush nor shrub to bear off any weather at all, and another storm brewing; I hear it sing i’ th’ wind.Yond same black cloud, yond huge one, looks like a foul bombarda large leather vessel for carrying or drinking liquor. that would shed his liquor.If it should thunder as it did before, I know not where to hide my head: yond same cloud cannot choose but fall by pailfuls.What have we here? a man or a fish? dead or alive?A fish: he smells like a fish; a very ancient and fish-like smell; a kind of not of the newest Poor-JohnDried and salted hake, regarded as cheap, inferior food.. A strange fish!Were I in England now, as once I was, and had but this fish painted, not a holiday fool there but would give a piece of silver: there would this monster make a man; any strange beast there makes a man.When they will not give a doitA small coin of very little value. to relieve a lame beggar, they will lay out ten to see a dead Indian.Legg’d like a man, and his fins like arms! Warm, o’ my troth!I do now let loose my opinion, hold it no longer: this is no fish, but an islander, that hath lately suffered by thunderbolt.Alas, the storm is come again!My best way is to creep under his gaberdine; there is no other shelter hereabout: misery acquaints a man with strange bed-fellows.I will here shroud till the dregs of the storm be past.
Enter Stephano singing; a bottle in his hand.
STEPHANO
I shall no more to sea, to sea,Here shall I die ashore—
STEPHANO
This is a very scurvy tune to sing at a man’s funeral.Well, here’s my comfort.
Drinks.
STEPHANO
The master, the swabbera sailor employed to wash and clean a ship's decks., the boatswain, and I,The gunner, and his mate,Lov’d Mall, Meg, and Marian, and Margery,But none of us car’d for Kate:For she had a tongue with a tang,Would cry to a sailor “Go hang!”She lov’d not the savour of tar nor of pitch,Yet a tailor might scratch her where’er she did itch.Then to sea, boys, and let her go hang.
STEPHANO
This is a scurvy tune too: but here’s my comfort.
Drinks.
CALIBAN
Do not torment me: O!
STEPHANO
What’s the matter? Have we devils here?Do you put tricks upon ’s with savages and men of IndIndia, proverbial for its wealth and exotic riches.? Ha?I have not scap’d drowning, to be afeard now of your four legs; for it hath been said, As proper a man as ever went on four legs cannot make him give ground; and it shall be said so again, while Stephano breathes at’ nostrils.
CALIBAN
The spirit torments me: O!
STEPHANO
This is some monster of the isle with four legs, who hath got, as I take it, an ague.Where the devil should he learn our language?I will give him some relief, if it be but for that.If I can recover him and keep him tame, and get to Naples with him, he’s a present for any emperor that ever trod on neat’s-leatherLeather made from the hide of cattle..
CALIBAN
Do not torment me, prithee; I’ll bring my wood home faster.
STEPHANO
He’s in his fit now, and does not talk after the wisest.He shall taste of my bottle: if he have never drunk wine afore, it will go near to remove his fit.If I can recover him, and keep him tame, I will not take too much for him.He shall pay for him that hath him, and that soundly.
CALIBAN
Thou dost me yet but little hurt; thou wilt anon,I know it by thy trembling: now ProsperProspero, the rightful Duke of Milan and the magician who rules the island. works upon thee.
STEPHANO
Come on your ways. Open your mouth; here is that which will give language to you, cat. Open your mouth.This will shake your shaking, I can tell you, and that soundly.You cannot tell who’s your friend: open your chaps again.
TRINCULO
I should know that voice: it should be—but he is drowned; and these are devils. O, defend me!
STEPHANO
Four legs and two voices; a most delicate monster!His forward voice now is to speak well of his friend; his backward voice is to utter foul speeches and to detract.If all the wine in my bottle will recover him, I will help his ague. Come. Amen!I will pour some in thy other mouth.
TRINCULO
Stephano!
STEPHANO
Doth thy other mouth call me? Mercy! mercy!This is a devil, and no monster: I will leave him; Ihave no long spoonA proverbial safeguard needed when dealing closely with the devil or another dangerous companion..
TRINCULO
Stephano! If thou beest Stephano, touch me, and speak to me; for I am Trinculo—be not afeared—thy good friend Trinculo.
STEPHANO
If thou beest Trinculo, come forth.I’ll pull thee by the lesser legs: if any be Trinculo’s legs, these are they.Thou art very Trinculo indeed!How cam’st thou to be the siege of this moon-calfA deformed or foolish creature supposedly produced under the moon’s influence; an abusive name for Caliban.? Can he vent Trinculos?
TRINCULO
I took him to be kill’d with a thunderstroke.But art thou not drown’d, Stephano?I hope now thou are not drown’d. Is the storm overblown?I hid me under the dead moon-calf’s gaberdine for fear of the storm.And art thou living, Stephano?O Stephano, two Neapolitans scap’d!
STEPHANO
Prithee, do not turn me about. My stomach is not constant.
CALIBAN
These be fine things, an if they be not sprites.That’s a brave god, and bears celestial liquor.I will kneel to him.
STEPHANO
How didst thou scape? How cam’st thou hither?Swear by this bottle how thou cam’st hither—I escaped upon a butt of sack, which the sailors heaved o’erboard, by this bottle! which I made of the bark of a tree with mine own hands, since I was cast ashore.
CALIBAN
I’ll swear upon that bottle to be thy true subject, for the liquor is not earthly.
STEPHANO
Here. Swear then how thou escapedst.
TRINCULO
Swum ashore, man, like a duck: I can swim like a duck, I’ll be sworn.
STEPHANO
Here, kiss the book. Though thou canst swim like a duck, thou art made like a goose.
TRINCULO
O Stephano, hast any more of this?
STEPHANO
The whole butt, man: my cellar is in a rock by th’ seaside, where my wine is hid. How now, moon-calf! How does thine ague?
CALIBAN
Hast thou not dropped from heaven?
STEPHANO
Out o’ the moon, I do assure thee: I was the Man in the Moon, when time was.
CALIBAN
I have seen thee in her, and I do adore thee. My mistress showed me thee, and thy dog, and thy bush.
STEPHANO
Come, swear to that. Kiss the book. I will furnish it anon with new contents. Swear.
TRINCULO
By this good light, this is a very shallow monster. I afeard of him? A very weak monster. The Man i’ the Moon! A most poor credulous monster! Well drawn, monster, in good sooth!
CALIBAN
I’ll show thee every fertile inch o’ the island; and I will kiss thy foot. I prithee, be my god.
TRINCULO
By this light, a most perfidious and drunken monster. When ’s god’s asleep, he’ll rob his bottle.
CALIBAN
I’ll kiss thy foot. I’ll swear myself thy subject.
STEPHANO
Come on, then; down, and swear.
TRINCULO
I shall laugh myself to death at this puppy-headed monster. A most scurvy monster! I could find in my heart to beat him,—
STEPHANO
Come, kiss.
TRINCULO
But that the poor monster’s in drink. An abominable monster!
CALIBAN
I’ll show thee the best springs; I’ll pluck thee berries;I’ll fish for thee, and get thee wood enough.A plague upon the tyrant that I serve!I’ll bear him no more sticks, but follow thee,Thou wondrous man.
TRINCULO
A most ridiculous monster, to make a wonder of a poor drunkard!
CALIBAN
I prithee, let me bring thee where crabs grow;And I with my long nails will dig thee pig-nutsAn edible nut-like tuber of a common woodland plant.;Show thee a jay’s nest, and instruct thee howTo snare the nimble marmoset; I’ll bring theeTo clustering filberts, and sometimes I’ll get theeYoung scamelsan unidentified bird or shellfish gathered for food. from the rock. Wilt thou go with me?
STEPHANO
I prithee now, lead the way without any more talking.Trinculo, the King and all our company else being drowned, we will inherit here. Here, bear my bottle.Fellow Trinculo, we’ll fill him by and by again.
CALIBAN
Farewell, master; farewell, farewell!
TRINCULO
A howling monster, a drunken monster.
CALIBAN
No more dams I’ll make for fish;Nor fetch in firingAt requiring,Nor scrape trencheringserving at table or attending upon diners., nor wash dish;’Ban ’Ban, Cacaliban,Has a new master—Get a new man.Freedom, high-day! high-day, freedom! freedom,high-day, freedom!
STEPHANO
O brave monster! lead the way.
Exeunta stage direction meaning that two or more characters leave the stage..